Thankfully not life or death decisions. More on the caliber of comfort kind of decisions. As in “should I do an exercise tape or go to bed and read?” And along the lines of “I just ate mac and cheese, but I really want some milk toast.”
Do you know what milk toast is? Does the very mention of those two words together make you throw up in your mouth? I was raised on milk toast. Probably not exactly correct, but the modern day version consists of toasting some bread, buttering it, putting it in a bowl, adding sugar to it, then pouring milk over it. Hence the name Milk Toast. So yeah, if you don’t like the idea of soggy bread, it might not appeal to you, but to me, it’s like manna from heaven.
Since the weather here has turned colder and the wind has decided to rear his ugly head once again, my walking regimen has been put on hold. Now for a little cause and effect. Because my walking regimen has been put on hold, my belly has increased dramatically in size in the last couple of weeks.
So instead of eating milk toast, then going to bed and reading, I decided perhaps to blog and bore you with more uninteresting stuff like milk toast recipes.
I’ve reached the age where my mind still says I can but my body says No Way Jose. Case in point.
Weekend before last, J-Dub, Ashy, and I took a weekend trip to Ruidoso, New Mexico. We were hoping to see some beautiful foliage, visit some family, have a nice weekend get-away, and find a house to live in. Not really on that last part, but my husband is set on moving to Ruidoso. Or anywhere close to the mountains.
Ashy and I decided to take a little walk around the neighborhood Saturday morning, so we set out with our tennis shoes, no cell phone, and a camera for a nice little stroll on a walking trail that wound around a fenced off golf course.
We stayed on course enjoying the weather, watching the crows that were as big as my yard chickens, and simply enjoying one another’s company.
Before we set out, we were told that the trail was about 3.5 miles long. Not bad. We could handle that. And we did. We did just fine until our trail ended and we were on a street. We didn’t know whether to turn left, turn right, or cross over. You might say we’d come to a crossroads. Literally. We lost sight of the trail and were forced with a decision, decision. So we decided we’d take a right turn since that was sort of the way we came. After walking a few several blocks, we still had our eyes on the golf course and knew that we weren’t lost. But then somehow we ended up behind some buildings that dead ended into the fenced off golf course again.
All during our walk we read signs posted on the golf course chainlink fence that read:
VIOLATORS WILL BE PROSECUTED
But before you knew it, we found ourselves trespassing across the golf course. We could see the trail on the other side. There were runners, walkers, and all we needed to do was get over there to them. It made sense that the quickest route to the trail we needed to get on, was to cross over the golf course.
Decisions, decisions. So we headed out walking across this golf course with elevated heart rates, not from the walk but rather from the thrill of trespassing, and all the while Ashy chanting, please don’t prosecute us, please don’t prosecute us.
Our destination was in sight. The trail was right before our eyes. We had traversed the golf course and made it to the trail. There was nothing stopping us from stepping onto it except the dadgum chain link fence that surrounded the entire golf course.
There was no gate nearby. No doorway. No tunnel. We’d been walking at least 45 minutes. My feet hurt. I was getting warm. I was thirsty, and I was tired of this adventure. I turned and looked around the area behind us of which we had travelled. Our choices were either to turn around and re-trespass over the golf course prolonging my misery or climb the chain link fence.
“We’re just going to have to climb this fence.” I told Ash. Of course the fear of getting caught was weighing on my mind. I thought surely no one would really harass a pregnant lady and a 12-year-old, but you never know in this day and age. We took our chances.
We walked over by a little grove of trees away from the trail, behind some buildings which we later discovered to be the police station, and I stood while Ash positioned her sandaled foot just so-so inside the chain links and climbed up and over the fence. I have never seen anyone climb a fence so slowly. I was on high alert, looking around for golf carts and flying golf balls, men with badges, and passersby.
“Hurry up!” I snapped at her, hoisting her on the butt. Then as she slung her leg over, of course her pants got hung on that pointy little part sticking over the top bar of the fence, and I had to wiggle it and yank on it to get her free as she gingerly positioned her feet on the opposite side and climbed herself down, safely on the non-trespassing side.
Now for my turn. Piece of cake. I mean how many chain link fences have I climbed in my life? At least 300. Not only have I climbed my own fences, I’ve watched COPS. I’ve seen how criminals can get over a fence in a couple of seconds time. My mind knew I could do this. All I had to do was put my hands on the top bar of that chain link fence and hoist my six month pregnant self on to the bar, then swing my legs over and climb down.
Now all I had to do was convince my body. I hoisted. I strained. I grunted. I jumped. I stood on my tippy toes. The fence was wobbly. My upper body was weak. After a few attempts, my heart rate was really elevated from the anxiety of getting caught climbing a fence and the exertion it was taking. I was sweating. In the mountains. In October.
Finally, with all the strength I could muster, I hoisted and slung my leg at the same time. I managed to get on top of the bar and laid there smashing my poor baby girl into my backbone, then flipped my legs over and let myself down.
Panting and red-bellied we limped home. Well I did anyway.
Thankfully without prosecution.
But more than likely, the whole thing is on someone’s surveillance camera. I hope they’re getting a kick out of it.
I think I’ll go eat some soggy bread now.