On this day a year ago, we lost my grandmother on my dad’s side. She was a beautiful lady who just happened to be born on my daughter’s birthday 94 years earlier. She left this world at age 96.
Because we lived a good distance apart, I don’t have a vast amount of memories of her, but the ones I have I hold near and dear. I have blogged about her before here. As a testament to her greatness are her children. I truly have never seen children love their mother so much. I have heard others, and have been guilty myself, of complaining about our moms. I have seen children growing frustrated with their aging parents and speaking harshly at times. But not my grannie’s kids. They loved her, doted on her, spoiled her rotten up until her last days. We can only hope to be as lucky in love.
I remember when I heard about her passing. We had known it was near, but one can never quite prepare themselves for the grief that comes. To be very honest, I was surprised at myself for my emotion that followed, but it was an emotion that I had never felt before. I don’t even know if I have the words to convey it. But it wasn’t just loss. It wasn’t just sadness. It wasn’t an empty feeling. It was a realization instead. A deep realization, that if the world follows natural laws, all the people who came before you will leave before you. Of course logically I know this, but she was my last grandparent remaining. My father had already died, and I realized that now my mother only remains.
I experienced a deep understanding that I am one living person left of being an orphan. I know it sounds ridiculous. An adult orphan. But my last grandparent dying made me realize that my mom is all that’s left of the people who, because of them, I exist.
Maybe no one else knows this feeling or maybe I’m just terrible at explaining it, but it’s what I know.
But anyway, time marches on, there’s nothing we can do about lost time or lost loved ones but to keep on living and remembering them.
The only thing that stays the same is everything changes. We as believers however, have a hope because of our savior that one day we will meet again in our eternal home where there is no sadness and there are no tears. Until then, we carry on.
Momma was the greatest of moms, yes we loved her so very much and spoiled her and I never regretted a moment of taking care of her, it was a privilege to be with her and see to her needs, I guess a mothers love goes way beyond anything we can ever fathom except Christ loving us, momma loved us all unconditionally as Jesus loves us, I never knew it would be so hard on an adult to loose their mom, so now I’ve lost three people in my life that meant the world to me, but I have hope of seeing them again in heaven
Beautiful Grandmother and beautifully written. Love
To my precious friend … what a beautiful tribute to your family matriarch! It is obvious looking at her photo, that she was loved and loving, cared for and caring. Her beautiful eyes still sparkled after seeing many sunrises and sunsets and were filled with wisdom! That photo is the epitome of a life well lived; (pearls and all 🙂 ) As an only child, I can’t tell you how many hundreds of times since I lost my beloved mother six years ago, I have said “I am an adult orphan”!! so I can truly say I understand your feelings! I don’t think there are words to explain that emotion, that feeling of emptiness. The one thing that keeps me going every day is my firm belief that the Lord will call me home and I will be reunited with my family yet once again! Praise be to Him!! As the Mother’s day holiday approaches, let us all pay homage to these special women in our lives; especially those who are blessed to still have them. You are one of a kind, dear heart, and an amazing role model for Emma. Special blessings to you on Mother’s Day! Until next time … Donna